The Bell Tolls

[lanaia74]

In the back ground I hear the old bell as it tolls in another year
My life never changed each day, each week, each year much like the other
A new year, I have existed so long, the thought brings me very little fear
Even if I am cursed, mankind and I are still brothers.

I respect life, I
hate the fact, t times I must steal another's life force
But long ago, I was bitten by the bat, that made my life turn into a living hell
This thing made me stick to a life, a life that had to stay on coarse
In the darkness and the shadows, I mostly choose to dwell.

Hiding my true self behind the curtain of night
I have no choice in this, it has been so long since I saw the light of day
When others see me, I give them such a fright
Them knowing what I am, everyone from me, if they can, they always run away.

So a new year means nothing to me, it will be the same as the last
Me cursed by the bat, my path is not a pleasant one
I did not ask in this horrific role to be cast
I long for the light of the sun, but this I can't do after everything said, everything done.

Hearing the bells toll in new year, means nothing special to me
I know I can't change what I am, I know my soul has been damned forever and a day
From myself I cannot flee
I wish I could, hearing the bells, just remind me, among the sun again I will never play.

So the only thing I can do is except the fact, I will live this hell for another year
I am scarred of being destroyed, I am afraid I will forever burn
So to me the tolling bell , just means another year of an existence, I truly fear
So for another year I will be a major cause for concern.

[immusie]

Boy oh boy Lanania..this is depressing to say the least, you paint such a bleak picture of yourself and your life..or the meaning of which it holds for you..and maybe others feel the same way about their lives, but there is always such a thing as hope and never letting go of your dreams of change...as only the person who finds themselves in this kind of rut can do anything about it....I know this really belongs under "post your Stories" but to have to wonder if it should not go under "The Dark Side" ?? I hope you at some point in the new year and find the brighter side of things, all you have to do is look for them.....muse

[jbstillwater]

Interesting to say the least, and I am assuming that this poem was written to show the dark side of humanity and how depression can be our worst enemy.

I m going to post one right now entitled "Salome's Wisdom"

Hope you like it

Jan

[countrygalcc]

You say it all-

So the only thing I can do is except the fact, I will live this hell for another year
I am scarred of being destroyed, I am afraid I will forever burn
So to me the tolling bell , just means another year of an existence, I truly fear
So for another year I will be a major cause for concern.


Live hell for another year, that would be working through this life and paying bills, bills, and more bills, and we can only hope to live another year cause we don't know when it's our last. I think about my uncle James I lost this past Oct. he didn't know last Dec. he was going to die this year it is a lot to think about but let's live life while we can ok :-)