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Post by aquarianstar on Jul 9, 2008 17:14:16 GMT -5
My innocence has seen this love bring harm, This love that is so wicked in its ways. It sets the blood and life of all ablaze. I do not write of Aphrodite's charm - The bliss that doth embolden and disarm Neither do I decry that odd malaise, Which offers gold and silver so much praise. But one which grips me always by the arm... And oh, its evils! Once to me disguised, Are worst of all the loves of my young heart. All other sighs and sweetness now despised This love has caused the world and I to part. Reality spoiled and idealised, And all for this daydream, this styx, this art.
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Post by aquarianstar on Jul 9, 2008 17:15:50 GMT -5
not a sonnet writer, this really was a challenge!!! lol
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Post by aquarianstar on Jul 9, 2008 17:32:07 GMT -5
AAAh. Just looked at the competition.. You all scare me with your talent. Best of luck to all!!!
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Post by immusie on Jul 10, 2008 5:31:27 GMT -5
AAAh. Just looked at the competition.. You all scare me with your talent. Best of luck to all!!! Awe....aqua, don't worry I feel the very same way, I hardly ever write a sonnett and this is probably the hardest one I have ever encountered, I had a very difficult time with it.....don't belittle yourself....I thought this a good one.....Once again, best of luck! musie
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Post by aquarianstar on Jul 10, 2008 11:18:02 GMT -5
Thanks for the boost Musie! *hugs* Although it was a challenge, I can see myself trying this again...
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Post by rrw on Jul 10, 2008 13:31:42 GMT -5
Aqua, I think it's great! it FEELS like a sonnet! Works as a piece of art... Good luck!
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Post by b4sunset on Jul 10, 2008 14:50:48 GMT -5
Great, great.. am enjoying your work, aqua friend!
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Post by heart2heart on Jul 11, 2008 7:09:03 GMT -5
Excellent sonnet, and iambic meter very good as well ! And the theme ? Delightful ! Best of Irish luck to you ! heart2Heart
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Post by rrw on Jul 11, 2008 10:15:00 GMT -5
I had to come back to this for another look... I don't know enough about the Italian form to comment much on whether the structure is "right." But if heart says its there, it's there. I will say this: It definitely is readable! I read it out loud and the words just flow in a beautiful rhythm and rhyme! Solid, solid sound and very specific thought about love. Great job!
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Post by johan on Jul 13, 2008 22:41:53 GMT -5
What can I say, just great my friend, good luck.
Johan
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Post by stephen on Jul 15, 2008 6:18:05 GMT -5
Great Petrarchan SL
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